Thursday, July 31, 2008

Back on the internets

Sorry for the Bernie Notes delay. Between moving and starting the new job, the last thing I wanted to do was be on the internets. But it's THURSDAY, the end of my first week is near, and public transportation was a little more speedy today.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

FY to the I

Bernie Notes posts may not be updated for the next little bit as we do the Moving Thang (returning to the eastern part of the state) and The End of My Glorious Freedom officially commences on 7/28/08 (although I am excited to start my job). You know, figuring out the internets, putting up all my curtains, relegating the Republican Boyfriend's things to the linen closet, letting go of the Spice Rack Drama Mama 2008 (you just don't want to know), etc. We pick up the moving truck tomorrow with a side trip to BJ's. Hilarity will most definitely ensue. So to all of you in the Herst area, I am really bad at goodbyes and just pretend that they don't happen. But I love all of you and I am only a gchat/facebook away.

Being neighborly: The sequel

Directions to feed the cats. It's not like we haven't been doing this for 20 years.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Bernie precautions

After a few mickey-mouse break-ins in the neighborhood, Bernie is being extra careful. My favorite police report of the summer resulting from the Republican Boyfriend's experience when he forgot to lock his car that was in our driveway:

Monday, June 23

RECOVERED PROPERTY

3:39 a.m. - Police received a report of a bag and contents strewn on Cherry Lane. The contents included $16 cash, a cell phone, a watch, three prescription bottles, ID card, deodorant, hand sanitizer, a library book, an umbrella, two pens, two Chap sticks, a lipstick, a wallet containing credit cards, a driver's license and a social security card. Police retrieved the bag and notified its owner, who claimed his property.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Sallie Mae

Bernie is paying off Sallie Mae for all of us, which I consider more than generous in this day and age of overinflated college endowments and ever-escalating tuition and fees. They know I am upset about leaving the homestead and Cher told me that I "Could come back . . . . . . . . To visit."

P.S. I found the payment booklet in the econometrics textbook. Hence the addition to Bernie's original note in red.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Get out of my house

A week from today I am officially leaving Bernie and Cher's household with EAM. At the age of Almost 27 (ewwwwww), I AM HAVING A REALLY HARD TIME WITH THIS. These past two years finishing grad school I've realized that even though we are all completely nutzo, I really love my parents. And I also have to leave Coco, which is a tragedy in and of itself. I am hopeful he will become the Permanent Foster Cat.

P.S. Just because the remaining Girls are leaving the nest (again), does not mean an end to Bernie Notes. He always manages to come through as evidenced by Notes for ELM in Seattle. Plus, there will always be Notes for Cher.



Thursday, July 17, 2008

Oil change instructions



I simply asked Bernie to leave me the phone number so I could give a call to schedule an oil change knowing full well it would result in some type of Bernie Note left on my desk.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Being neighborly

id est/that is to say/in other words/in this case

Monday, July 14, 2008

Laundry notes

I like the arrow (but still not as good as the Lettuce Note).

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Notes for T.W. redux

The only time Bernie uses a debit card is when he goes overseas. Bernie and Cher are those people in the line who write out a check and there are like 50 people waiting behind them OR even better--those people who write checks out for cash and then bring them to the bank teller. When I got my first debit card at age 18 Cher yelled at me that I was too irresponsible for a credit card.

I was really ticked when they went to France and stopped The Paper (as evidenced here), one of my only sources of entertainment (as I continue to enjoy my two-month last hurrah escape from reality-until-I-win-the-lottery vacation through July 28th, 12:00am EST) aside from Captain Video, the Amherst Bulletin, and books from the Jones Library where my ultimate goal is to find a book with the insert "Congratulations!!! You've got a . . . HOT ITEM. Check Out for 7 Days Only. No Renewals. Overdue fines on this book accumulate at $1/day. Please return this book to the Jones Library ONLY."

Growing up Polish

Bernie got mad at me this evening because I ate the rest of "his" pickles. He did not understand how I could have eaten 4 whole entire Klassen's. Well I can tell you how. Those things are like 5 calories each and last weekend I couldn't fit into my camping pants. So then I grilled Bernie some kielbasa, whipped out the horseradish and all was well. Speaking of Polish, this is the Republican Boyfriend's idea of wrapping paper which was the only highlight after realizing my birthday present was the "rolls royce of battery rechargers."

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

It takes a village to determine the relationship between infant mortality and rich share

I should have titled my capstone "It Takes A Village," primarily because without certain econometricians (i.e. Bernie, BG, and a special peer reviewer) in the picture, I may have had 44 more panic attacks and stress breakdowns that would have required more than a trip to psychological disability services and various fast food drive-thru windows. That being said, check out Bernie's visual explanation of instrumental variables and the Hausman test ON REUSED PAPER NO LESS. I mean, where would we be as a world without knowing whether or not the trade-off in variance using an IV is Way Worth It versus regular old ordinary least squares regression? (Sidenote: Bernie recently tried to make me give him his Stock and Watson book back, and I refused.)

A Bernie Visualization of my panel data and dummy variables for 1970, 1990, and 2000 and my instrumental variable. THANK YOU BERNIE.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Always looking out

Bernie recently switched his insurance coverage. Although he made sure to cover all of his bases (i.e. our needs) before switching, hilarity has ensued. Bonus: more Bernie notes.

Monday, July 7, 2008

AAA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. The best part is definitely the heart.

Bernie banking

Forget about debit cards, Bernie refuses the entire concept of online banking and online bill-pay. This, coming from a man who runs to the bank drive-thru window because it opens a half-hour earlier than the bank itself.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Notes for T.W.

Bernie is rarely home at the time he says he will be. Or he runs home and messes around with his lawn and garden while we are sitting on the porch already eating dinner. In an attempt to appease Cher, he will sometimes write out a detailed itinerary. We know to tack on an hour to any of Bernie's estimated times of arrival.
T.W. is code for Tweety Bird or just plain Tweety, Cher's nickname. Don't ask.


Tuesday, July 1, 2008

More cars more problems

I would have really gotten a kick out of it if he had run to my office so I could drive him to the Honda dealership.